It Gets Better - Dan Savage

In response to the recent suicide of Billy Lucas, a fifteen-year-old Indiana teenager who was taunted for being gay, Dan Savage has launched a new initiative, the It Gets Better Project, to communicate to young gay kids that their lives are not hopeless despite the bigotry and hatred they may encounter in their communities and from their families and so-called friends. As Dan tells it:

"My heart breaks for the pain and torment you went through, Billy Lucas," a reader wrote after I posted about Billy Lucas to my blog. "I wish I could have told you that things get better." I had the same reaction: I wish I could have talked to this kid for five minutes. I wish I could have told Billy that it gets better. I wish I could have told him that, however bad things were, however isolated and alone he was, it gets better.

But gay adults aren't allowed to talk to these kids. Schools and churches don't bring us in to talk to teenagers who are being bullied. Many of these kids have homophobic parents who believe that they can prevent their gay children from growing up to be gay—or from ever coming out—by depriving them of information, resources, and positive role models.

Why are we waiting for permission to talk to these kids? We have the ability to talk directly to them right now. We don't have to wait for permission to let them know that it gets better. We can reach these kids. So here's what you can do, GBVWS: Make a video. Tell them it gets better. I've launched a channel on YouTube to host these videos. My normally camera-shy husband and I already posted one.

Watch the beautiful, funny, touching, and hope-filled video above, and then go to the YouTube page and see how you can submit your own video message to gay kids. It will be noticed. It is necessary. Dan Savage quotes the man himself: "You gotta give 'em hope," Harvey Milk said.

It Gets Better Project (YouTube)

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You're GAY?!? *Yawwwwwnn...*

Interesting article from the New York Times on celebrities coming out -- do such revelations matter as much today as they once did?

The relative indifference Americans have these days about high-profile people coming out appears rooted not only in progressively tolerant views of gay people but in the rather cynical supposition that stars wait to come out until they see a financial benefit, or have little to lose. Mr. Martin is past the prime of his career. Ms. Wright is promoting an album and a new book about her life as a closeted lesbian, and her revelation gives her exposure to a potential fan base outside traditional country audiences.

“With more and more gays and lesbians coming out in middle school and high school, it’s hard not to view coming out post-peak in your career or whenever as cowardly, if not opportunistic,” said Dan Savage, the gay author and editorial director of The Stranger, a Seattle newsweekly, where he writes an advice column called “Savage Love.”

“Now that I have my millions, now that it’s totally safe, now that I can scoop up a few more fans, I will come out,” Mr. Savage added. “Forgive me, but I have much more admiration for those kids coming out in middle school.”

I have to agree with what Dan Savage said. Still, in certain demographics such revelations may help straights understand gays better, especially the ones they find in their midst. I'm a little less harsh on the late coming-out stories of older people like Maurice Sendak and James Randi. I'm of a generation between them and the middle-schoolers coming out today, and I know how much the fear of revealing the truth about myself weighed on me more than I would like to remember just a few decades ago. When I was younger the celebrity revelations inspired me (some); today it's the kids daring to be themselves that bring tears to my eyes. There's still a long way to go, though...

"Coming Out: When Love Dares Speak, and Nobody Listens" (NY Times; and yes, I did fix that headline because the missing "s" was driving me batty!)

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"Keep it gay! Keep it gay! Keep it gay!"

The story of how outspoken sex columnist Dan Savage and his husband Terry Miller adopted a kid has been turned into a musical!

Perhaps reality TV isn’t the right venue for teachable moments that could be easily misconstrued by Savage haters. Like the time 9-year-old DJ, who thought girls were icky, jumped to the conclusion that he must be gay, until Miller showed him a photo of himself, surrounded by girls, on his 10th birthday. “If you liked girls right now,” he said, “that would probably mean you’re gay.”

I love that quote. One of the first things that made me realize that I was different, when I was about seven or eight, was that I actually liked playing with girls.

The Kid Stays in the Picture

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